Mothers of children beware! Our words can come out anywhere!

I have enjoyed volunteering in Blake's classroom so much. Kindergartners are so fun. Every Wednesday I come home with at least one good story from the day. Blake's teacher is so used to them that she doesn't even laugh anymore. Here are my favorites, and of course the best is saved for last.

Me: "Tanner, what's your middle name?"

Tanner: "Tanner Jones."

Me: "No, that's your last name. Your middle name is between that. Tanner something Jones."

Tanner: "No, I don't have one. "

Me: "Oh, okay."

2 minutes of silence pass. Then he looks at me and says, "Oh I know what it is. When my mom gets mad at me she calls me Tanner Ashton Jones. Is that it?"

Me: "Yep."

Another day Blake's teacher was reading a story to the class about different ways people travel around the world. She was talking about Egypt and how people use Camels there. One little boy raised his hand and with confidence said, "Camels are what they use to make cigarettes." Not quite.

Then there's Blake's buddy Andy (pictured above with Blake). He is a riot. He's the kid who is always saying stories with such excitement, but at the time when he's not supposed to be telling stories, so he's often told to be quiet. Last week after the Inauguration, Blake's teacher asked the class if any of the students had seen any of it on TV. Most of the kids raised their hands. She asked, "Raise your hand if you saw how happy people were to get a new president." The kids could hardly sit in their chairs, they were raising their hands so high.
"Now raise your hand if you saw some people crying tears of joy because they were extra glad that they had a new president. Did anyone see that?" Well, Andy was practically doing back flips because he wanted to talk so badly.
"Ms. Harley," he said as he got out of his chair and stood at attention, "The people who were the happiest were the black people because they never thought they'd see the day that our country would finally be led by a black president! That's what my mom said!" He was so proud.
"That's mostly true Andy," She said. Another girl McKenna was raising her hand very high as well.
"McKenna," Ms. Harley called.

She too stood at attention. "My mom told ME that Mrs. Obama looked pregnant in her dress!"

Ms. Harley didn't even crack a smile. She just patiently explained that was the design of the gown and that she didn't think the Obamas planned to have more children. I, on the other hand, had both hands over my mouth to keep from spitting out the big drink of coffee I had just taken.

It was then I learned that no longer are my words at home safe at home. Anything I say can and will be used against me in the classroom without warning. And I think, no, I KNOW I have already blown it, so the best I can do is pray for Blake to have short term memory problems. Aye, yie, yie!