Poland Part 1: The News

This trip was amazing. Incredible. I found new fears and broke down ones I didn't think were possible to overcome. (Besides the fear of going 10 days without coffee...only to find there was an espresso machine right there in our living quarters!) Physically I was pushed and hurt in little tiny corners of my shoulders and toes that usually don't demand much attention. Friendships were deepened through both the toughest of times and the true release of late-night belly laughs. Tears were shed by seeing repeatedly how good my God is, and just how majestically he works through the big things and in the little things, specifically in me.
I suppose it will take several posts to talk about the easier things (the traveling, the beauty of the city itself, the food, etc.) and the harder things that I'm still processing. But it will all be on here and hopefully worth the read. So now we begin with Poland Part 1:

The News

So, remember the last post? I was a bit whiny and preachy. The way I usually get when I'm insecure with the way things are going. But if I do recall, the main reason I was going on this trip in the first place was not because I wanted to, but rather out of obedience to God. I was no longer going to sit around and waste my time waiting for this foster baby process. I was going to get out there and work for God, wether that meant doing something I considered fun or not. Poland with a bunch of teenagers doing street ministry? Not.

On the trip we are told to not have any contact with home. Mostly for the sake of the kids with the overbearing moms. Give them an inch and they'll expect a mile. Well, the ministry just doesn't have time to stop every half hour so that Jimmy can get ahold of his mom to tell her he took his vitamins on time and ate the crust on his PB and J. To make the rule easiest, they've just said everyone going on the trip has to follow the same no-contact rule.

Well, you see, we had the head guy Mark, at our hostel. He had a computer and he was kind enough to let us leaders have a couple of minutes in the evening to post a note to our spouses on facebook. It was wonderful. Almost made the trip harder because it made us miss them more, but it was wonderful. One night I knew Mark was leaving the next day, so as I was chatting live with my Mikey, I said, "I won't be able to talk anymore as Mark's taking the computer but I love you to bits and bits and pray for us!!!" That would be all for 6 more days. I wrote in my journal and went to sleep. Very early in the morning Sherry woke me up. She said, "Darbi, Mike's on the computer and needs to talk to you right away." My first thought, honestly? Who's dead? I barely had my balance and walked into the men's dorm room and got on. Mike was on-line. I said, "Hello?"

"Hi. Did you see it?"

"See what? What's going on?" All possible tragedies are going through my mind.

"Your pictures. Go to your page and look at your pictures."

And here is the picture I saw:

I couldn't believe my eyes. I knew this day would come but not so soon. I mean, I know that sounds funny when we've been waiting almost 2 years on a 6 month process, but let me explain. There are times when I pray and pray about something and it seems God doesn't answer the way I want, or he doesn't answer in a black and white way, so it leaves me "guessing" as to what I am supposed to be doing...the "best answer", or how I could best be doing what he would want me to do. But then there are times like these (and they don't happen very often) when I say to God, "I want to have a foster baby, but I want to follow you more so I'm going on this trip. If YOU WANT me to have a foster baby, then let your will be done in your time. It's hard to wait, but it's in your time." And on that very trip, it happens.

I learned so much about myself on the trip, more confidence on who I am in God, what kind of a mom I can be because of the things I can do on his strength, that I just feel even more equipped to fight for these babies that so desperately need homes and need Jesus even more. I am ready now and he knew that. And I just can't wait. As soon as a baby is ready for us THEY WILL CALL!!!! Isn't that exciting?!?!?

Goodnight for now.